Michael Lohan blabbed about Lindsay yesterday, so it's only fitting and fair if Dina gets some face time today. I'm convinced they're working off an agreed rota: "OK Michael? MICHAEL? Stop reading that bible for a second. PUT the Bible DOWN! OK, so if you talk about Lindsay next week, the 7th, I can then refute everything you say the next day. Then I'll say something, in approximately a month - when are you launching whatever it is you've got in the works? What is it, clerical wear for inmates. Good look with that. OK I'll sayin something around then, which you can then say is a world of hooey? Deal? Copacetic."

Dina went out of her way to contact the New York Post yesterday (on the very day she was launching her new shoe range. Such dedication) to rebut Michael's claims that Lindsay is in the grip of prescription drug addiction:

"I don't go - like my ex - on national television and make things up (I just partake in low-rent reality shows with my younger kids). He's estranged from Lindsay; he doesn't know what's going on in her life. Michael doesn't talk to her. I've had full custody of all my children for the last 10 years. He has been incarcerated for some of that time (which is probably why I have full custody...) so whatever is going on in Lindsay's personal life is our business. And for him getting paid to say things about her (leaves me raging - that's MY money) when he's five months behind in child support is wrong. I can't change Michael to make him do the right thing - that's up to him and God ('cause I'm religious too, you betcha). But it is hurtful for a child for her own father, whom she has no relationship with, to say things in public about her like that."

According to The Post: "When we asked if Lindsay does have addiction problems, Dina, who sounded tired and emotional (that's usual code for 'drunk'), said, 'I have no idea what he is talking about. I can't comment on everything my ex says'." But I'll try, Godnammit.

As for Lindsay's "collection" getting panned at Paris Fashion Week, and Dina launching a shoe range which, as it turns out, won't have the catchy name 'Shoe-Han': "The critics can say whatever they want, but Lindsay is a genius... And we are not going to announce the name (of not the 'Shoe-Han') so every Google and MySpace buys the domain name (??... OK, don't you think it's about time you came across with the actual name and have a website in the works given you've launched the shoes?). Lindsay is signed to Ungaro, but she will definitely have input (into whatever the shoes are called) because she is so talented." At having paparazzi follow her around.

Finally, Dina left the conversation with: "Leave Lindsay alone. Let her be a real 23-year-old (just like Dina left her to be a real 13-year-old). Let her grow (like I did, by letting her go on Letterman when she was six), and let her artistic abilities flourish. Stop judging the Britneys and the Lindsays. They are very creative girls, and that is a gift from a higher power of God."

Dina, in her tired and emotional (possibly drunk) state, must've mistaken the word 'creative' with 'whipped cash cow.' 

In other Lohan news: Lindsay had this to say of fashion design totally being her true calling: " Life's a little bit tragic, don't you think? (when you've got parents like yours, absolutely). I never felt pushed into acting (bollocks). Even thought it can get a bit monotonous always being on set. But the thing is, I never had acting lessons. I panic sometimes when I have a monologue to learn but then weirdly I look at the lines and they just attach themselves to my memory. But fashion is what I really love. I think it all works hand in hand - music, film, fashion. It's not as if I have a five-year plan (you don't say)... I'm going to be in Paris for a long time. And I'm going to take French lesson, because I loved it at school. I cried when I saw my new office. It’s got two balconies overlooking the Eiffel Tower!"

How very SJP of her... Hang on, someone allowed Lindsay access to two balconies? I can see the headlines now...